This morning I watched another video of the 21-Day Conscious Cleanse by Dr. Shefali Tsabary and Suzi Lula. Another morning of inspiration and insight—I couldn’t keep myself from taking copious notes on the computer as I listened to one “Aha” moment after another.
Today part of the conversation was about how to honor oneself and connect with one’s inner divinity. Ideas were shared including taking the time to shop for healthy, fresh food, to take a walk in nature, to read an inspiring poem, and last but certainly not least—to prepare a luscious meal for oneself and eat it by candlelight.
This last one reminded me of a thought I have been having over the years. As an observant Jew, I have done similar actions to uplift the Sabbath —lighting candles and eating a lovely meal—but it didn’t connect me to honoring myself. I realized this acutely for the first time in February of 2015, when I attended a spirituality retreat in which they lit candles on a candlestick shaped like a goddess. I later threw out the candlestick when I arrived home, since although I thought it was beautiful and loved the feelings of empowerment it gave me, I was concerned that it may have been considered an idol.
Even after disposing of it, to this day, I still remember that feeling of self-honor it gave me—to light a candle for myself, for my own well-being. After a lifetime of lighting candles, or watching my mom or others light candles to honor the Sabbath, I felt this strong pull to light a candle to enhance the mood around me—to honor myself, my soul. After all, there is a piece of G-d in every one of us—but somehow mine got lost in the mix of religious tradition, I had become divorced from my own inner divinity.