Years ago, I went to talks on spiritual growth where the teacher said she was teaching on topics that she herself was working on.
That approach resonates with me as well. Topics such as mindfulness, meditation, mental health, and emotional well-being are close to my heart.
I continue to aspire to be able to use my own personal experiences to create a conversation/community where others can reflect on their own.
In that spirit, here is what I’ve been chewing on recently…
Thoughts.
Boy, have I been having a lot of them. Often the same ones.
And, boy, do I believe them when I have them.
I wrote about this in a previous post months ago, recognizing I had gotten caught in the undertow and drawn in by a multitude of thoughts that were bringing me down and/or making me feel overwhelmed.
For a while I haven’t even been aware of this dynamic. I have just been believing all my thoughts. Forgetting that they are often not the most accurate representation of how things actually are.
The thing is, one’s way of thinking is deeply ingrained. And so, I can’t just wake up one day, become aware of my unconstructive patterns, and flip the switch to change them.
It takes time. It takes steady practice. Like water running over a rock. Over time, the rock changes form. Over time.
And so, I am hoping to meditate regularly (a goal I’ve set I don’t know how many times previously, but I mean it now!!). Sneak peak at Wellness Book Club week 10—Nate Dallas, author of You’re Too Good to Feel This Bad says that he sucked at meditation for a few months before it started bringing him peace. Which means, it’s okay that it takes time to work, I just have to keep at it! With more realistic expectations, perhaps I will!
Speaking of more realistic expectations, the second thing I noticed about my thinking recently is that when I have a list of things I have to do, I tell myself I have to complete the task, and it has to be perfect and/or go smoothly.
Instead, I think I would be better off going in with the intention of doing my best, and understanding that I can’t necessarily control the outcome. I cannot demand things to go perfectly. I mean, I can, but it makes me miserable when things do not go as planned. And when they do, I continue to be fed the illusion of control, which is just that—an illusion—and so even if I have not faced my humility and my limitations in that particular instance, it is bound to catch up with me at some point.
I can’t avoid pain.
But I can avoid putting myself in situations that are bound to cause suffering.
And ironically, it seems that, sometimes, when I am trying to avoid pain, I create scenarios that actually increase it.
I can run, but I can’t hide….
Let go and let G-d.
Mindful Nuggets 