As humans we are constantly evolving. Often change is so minuscule, so incremental, that we do not notice it.
When I was pregnant with my daughter 4 years ago, I kept bracing myself for the evolution that would come when I became a mother. As if my self-expression would go away. I would no longer be known as Gila, rather Talia’s mom.
Boy, did that expectation NOT come true. First of all, we ended up calling my daughter by her middle name, not her first.
Second of all, being a mom accentuated being a Gila. The type of mom I am is very influenced by my values, beliefs, and personality.
Being a mom has pushed me to the brink. Meal planning ahead for the week is no longer a choice. It’s a necessity for survival—for my own well-being, as well as my daughters. It’s living out my dream of being a nutrition counselor while praying that down the line my daughter finds a career she is passionate about. It’s drawing with crayons in a tent alongside my daughter and discovering how damn meditative it can be!
Those are just some examples.
For all you moms out there, I invite you this Mother’s Day to pick one thing you have been beating yourself up about—something you wish you did differently with regards to your kid/s, and forgive yourself wholly for that one thing.
Give yourself a pass.
Take a step back, look at all you’ve accomplished. All you’ve done. From enduring child labor to persevering through the daily labor of weekday routines and structures.
Take a step back. And give yourself a pat on the back.

Gila is the author of She Pooped, I’m Pooped: Motherhood Year One. Available on Amazon in paperback and e-book edition.