What does it mean that I am self-actualizing and crystallizing my thoughts on self-love while still deep down sabotaging myself at the core and reliving my worst unhealthy patterns. I guess I’ve evolved to a new level. I guess I’m at a new vantage point. I guess I’m challenging myself in new ways. I really … Continue reading Self-Actualization Realization
Tag: self-awareness
So, Goodbye
Give too much in the beginning My world is great, my head is spinning Things begin to slow down thoA frown appears to express woe Have I kissed another frog?Am I seeing clearly? Or thru smog?I felt I meant so much to himBut now he treats me on a whimHe saw me and still talked … Continue reading So, Goodbye
Sun Versus Moon Continued
Looking back, I've oft-resented the guys I dated for not seeing all my talents. For belittling me. For thinking of me as just a fresh piece of meat who could please them. But I suppose it's not their fault. That is how I presented myself. And it is how I saw myself. In that situation. … Continue reading Sun Versus Moon Continued
Yo Quiero Taco Bell
In 7th grade we had a school sleepover and I wore a t-shirt to sleep that said "Yo quiero Taco Bell" and had a picture of the chihuahua from the commercial. My whole childhood I was self-conscious about wearing shirts with words on them. I didn't want to make a statement, make waves, offend someone, … Continue reading Yo Quiero Taco Bell
Ugly Duck Syndrome
Growing up I was the kid who everyone liked but didn’t necessarily invite to their parties. I wasn’t an outcast, but I wasn’t an incast either. I had my couple close friends and we were happy but I always wanted wished to be more part of the social world surrounding me. Like I said in … Continue reading Ugly Duck Syndrome
What I am Is What I am
The title of this essay was inspired by the song “What I am” by Edie Brickell & New Bohemians. I’m flying on the airplane and watching the flight stats on the screen. It says the measurements in “imperial” and “metric.” I always knew the US was NOT metric. But I didn’t know it had a … Continue reading What I am Is What I am
Back Together Again; Humpty Dumping
You met me when I was lowWaited to see how far I’d goPushed me when I was moving too slowAccording to YouI was broken thenConfused and lostWasn’t my own bossLeaned on others like they were my crossIt took me a while But I picked myself upI learned and I grew To trust my inner gut … Continue reading Back Together Again; Humpty Dumping
Greater Self-Awareness in Stepping Back
I watched a video about low self-esteem recently by psychiatrist Rabbi Dr. Abraham Twerski and it made me realize how my low self-esteem is for sure a real thing—even if there's no official diagnosis for it. And I've been more aware recently of how much I need external validation to fill the internal void inside … Continue reading Greater Self-Awareness in Stepping Back
Tuning In: One’s Inner State
I like connecting with others and am eager to understand them and what they are going through. This empathy with others is sometimes at the expense of empathy with myself. There are times when my interest in others is purely my caring, good-natured spirit, and there are other times, when, subconsciously, I am seeking to … Continue reading Tuning In: One’s Inner State
Losing Yourself in a Relationship, Losing Yourself in Your Work
As I began my early morning dive into my remote side job, I reminded myself that when this is over I will still be me, and I will have to work toward a calmer, more relaxed inner state. This is a short-term project, one that I have committed a lot of energy, attention, and care … Continue reading Losing Yourself in a Relationship, Losing Yourself in Your Work
Mindful Nuggets 